Gallery: Vaporware 2010: The Great White Duke
01duke-nukem-forever
It's time again for Wired's annual Vaporware awards, when we recognize the products, videogames and other nerdy tidbits pitched, promised and hyped, but never delivered. Maybe you saw a demo at CES that made your wallet stand at attention? Maybe there was a trailer that pushed your pulse into the red? Maybe a keynote speaker pulled something out of his pocket at a mega-conference as thousands of flashbulbs exploded? But in the end, it was all just smoke and mirrors. The magical item never materialized, and you never heard of it again ... until it landed on our list. We asked you, our readers, to reach into your suck buckets and [chum the waters](http://stag-komodo.wired.com/business/2010/12/vaporware-2010-a-call-for-submissions/). You nominated scores of games, gadgets, movies and wares. You voted up the biggest losers, we tallied the results and we checked the facts. Some things you sent in are still only rumors (Verizon iPhones) and some seeming shoo-ins actually shipped (Chevy Volt) so we had to disqualify them. But we've still got an awesome list this year. So sit back and prepare to inhale the fail. Here are Wired's 2010 Vaporware Award honorees. __Above:__ 11. *Duke Nukem Forever* ------------------------ We kick off the 14th edition of our annual Vaporware awards with an homage to the King of Vaporware, The Sultan of Suck, the Chief Executive Officer of Fail — not to mention two-time lifetime achievement-award winner and the unofficial Vaporware mascot — Duke Nukem. The titular character in the long-delayed [Duke Nukem Forever](http://www.dukenukemforever.com/) videogame has appeared on almost every list we've ever run, so it didn't feel right leaving him off in 2010, especially with all the activity he's been seeing lately. DNF developer 3D Realms, after keeping us waiting for the next Duke Nukem sequel for an amazing 12 years, finally [fell into a financial black hole](http://stag-komodo.wired.com/gamelife/2009/05/duke-nukem-forever-dev-shuts-down/) in 2009. The project has since been taken over by Gearbox Software, which has promised to deliver DNF in 2011. Like, for real. A [working version](http://stag-komodo.wired.com/gamelife/2010/09/duke-nukem-pax/) of DNF was even on display at the PAX 2010 gaming conference, and thousands of attendees played it. So while the Duke isn't tops this year, and isn't even technically eligible for a Vaporware award, he still gets an honorable mention. After all, *we're still waiting* for DNF to arrive. Until then, Duke 'em if you got 'em.
© 2010 8 Legged Productions, LLC., © 2010 8 Legged Productions, LLC., © 2010 8 Legged Productions, LLC.02spider-man-turn-off-the-dark
10. *Spider-Man: Turn Off the Dark* ----------------------------------- Our spidey sense is tingling in anticipation of seeing the famous web-slinger make the jump from the comics page to the Broadway stage. But exactly when the play will be finished remains as mysterious as Peter Parker's night job. [Spider-Man: Turn Off the Dark](http://spidermanonbroadway.marvel.com/#home) definitely has all the trappings of a show-biz mega-event: The music is by Bono and The Edge, it's being directed from the award-winning Broadway vet Julie Taymor, the sets are stupid-expensive and the show has multiple, highly technical stunts including aerial melees between actors on wire rigs suspended over the audience. But the technical complications with all that flying, and trouble scraping together funding — at $65 million, it's the most expensive Broadway show ever — have delayed the opening. Now, Turn Off the Dark's [opening date has been pushed](http://stag-komodo.wired.com/underwire/2010/12/spider-man-musical-postponed/) from December 2010 into February 2011. It's currently in previews, but theater productions aren't considered done until they officially open. Technical problems are causing the performances to be interrupted by lengthy pauses, and Taymor and the U2 boys are tweaking the ending to speed up the story. Plus, safety is still a major concern: A couple of players have been injured, and in one recent preview, Spidey stuntman Christopher Tierney's harness failed, sending him 30 feet through the air into the orchestra pit and landing him in the hospital. Actress Natalie Mendoza, who suffered a concussion in a backstage fall, was reported leaving the show last week.
03l-a-noire
9. *L.A. Noire* --------------- Rockstar Games has pushed back the release of its [1940s detective title](http://www.rockstargames.com/lanoire), which is now set to land on Xbox 360 and PlayStation 3 consoles in the spring. The delay is particularly excruciating because Rockstar's [Red Dead Redemption](http://www.rockstargames.com/reddeadredemption/) did a magnificent job of transporting GTA-style gameplay to the Old West, and we were eager to see if the publisher could work similar magic in a Raymond Chandler-esque setting. "I've been waiting for L.A. Noire since it was first announced in 2004," says Wired reader Tom. "Its original 2007 release has now slipped to 2011. Am I finally going to get the chance to be Philip Marlowe?"
04kno-tablet
8. Kno Tablet ------------- This oversized tablet was [first hyped last summer](http://stag-komodo.wired.com/gadgetlab/2010/06/kno-textbook-tablet/) as the ultimate piece of gear for college students. The [Kno](http://kno.com/) comes in two sizes, a huge 14.1-inch touchscreen and huger dual-screen version. It's way bigger than an iPad, making it an awkward accessory to lug around campus, but if you do lug it, you can use the included stylus to take notes in class. It has a built-in digital bookstore. So it should still be easier to carry than a 30-pound backpack full of expensive textbooks, right? We wish we knew the answer — so far, the Kno has been a Kno-show. They were supposed to be [delivered by December 20](http://stag-komodo.wired.com/gadgetlab/2010/11/kno-textbook-tablet-for-christmas-one-screen-or-two/), but that date slipped. In all fairness, Kno says it started shipping the tablets to fill pre-orders a few days before Christmas. But we still haven't seen our Kno, and unless you've received an [exclusive pre-order invitation](http://kno.com/waitlist-landing), you may not have it before the next semester starts. The company tells *PC Mag* its "limited-quantity and invitation-only" [shipments will be staggered over the next month](http://www.pcmag.com/article2/0,2817,2374619,00.asp) so as not to strain the supply chain. Sounds to us like a contingency plan instigated by Kno just to avoid landing on our list. Sorry, dudes, not good enough.
05netflix-on-android
7. Netflix on Android --------------------- In a Reddit thread from August, [Netflix confirmed](http://www.reddit.com/r/IAmA/comments/cy2nu/iama_netflix_employee_ama/c0w49gl) it was hard at work on an official Android app for its popular streaming service, which is already present on Apple's iOS devices and Windows Phone 7 hardware. Then, in November, Netflix product developer [Greg Peters posted word](http://blog.netflix.com/2010/11/netflix-on-android.html) on the company's official blog that streaming for some, but not all, Android devices would arrive in 2011, later than expected. The hang-up? Hollywood wants its DRM, and [Android can't deliver](http://stag-komodo.wired.com/business/2010/11/why-isnt-netflix-on-android-not-secure-enough-to-suit-hollywood/). "The hurdle has been the lack of a generic and complete platform security and content-protection mechanism available for Android," Peters writes. One Wired reader filed a reasoned complaint: "You would expect all the tablet products available this Xmas running Android would be able to let you watch Netflix on them, just like the iPad does. But no."
06notion-ink-adam
6. Notion Ink Adam ------------------ Indian startup [Notion Ink](http://www.notionink.com/) wowed gadget-lovers in late 2009 with the announcement of its Android-running, Pixel Qi display-sporting [Adam tablet](http://www.notionink.com/features.php). The company said it would be available in 2010. But the calendar has turned, and this hot tech toy is still as elusive as cold fusion. The company first said it would be here in time for the holiday shopping rush. Nope. Then it said it would be available for pre-order in December to ship by Christmas. Nope. A pre-order page for the Adam finally went up in mid-December — the Pixel Qi version sold out in hours, the cheaper LCD version took a few days — but the 10-inch tablets won't ship until the end of January. [Maybe](http://notionink.wordpress.com/2010/12/11/what-we-have-learnt-in-the-past-2-day/). "In spite of the truly rabid fans, this thing has been promised a couple of times within 2010, and missed every time," says an anonymous Wired reader. "Who knows, maybe at CES 2011 we'll see a real picture or a video or — oh, god — an actual physical device." Another reader put it more succinctly. "Notion Ink Adam: Vaportablet."
07chrome.jpg
5. Chrome OS Laptops -------------------- Google promised we'd all be using Chrome OS's futuristic web apps on our laptops [before the end of this year](http://stag-komodo.wired.com/gadgetlab/2009/11/google-chrome-os-ditch-your-hard-drives-the-future-is-the-web/). While the company showed off a real, honest-to-goodness [working version of Chrome OS](http://www.webmonkey.com/2010/12/google-shows-off-chrome-os-along-with-a-store-to-fill-it-up/) in December (we even played with one of the stealthy [Cr-48 pilot laptops](http://stag-komodo.wired.com/gadgetlab/2010/12/cr-48-chrome-os-first-look/) made available to developers) the web-based OS still being tested and isn't yet ready for the general public. Google has revised its schedule and is now saying consumer versions of Chrome OS laptops will arrive mid-2011. The first ones will reportedly be [reportedly](http://stag-komodo.wired.com/gadgetlab/2010/11/chrome-os/) made by Acer and Hewlett-Packard. While [Chrome OS](http://www.google.com/chromeos/) is an open source project, and you can run it on a wide variety of hardware devices now if you're comfortable compiling code from source, the days of being able to buy a netbook pre-loaded with Chrome OS are still just a fantasy.
08black-mesa
4. *Black Mesa* --------------- A full year after its release date slipped from 2009 to 2010, this [fan-developed remake](http://www.blackmesasource.com/) of the original Half Life, which expands on the universe and gameplay of the classic first-person shooter, now resides in the all-too-familiar "done when it's done" category. We feel bad ripping on a project that's being hand-built for fans, by fans, but the fact that Black Mesa has been in development for more than seven years and is currently AWOL does not bode well for its future. "I know it's not a professional project, but still," says one anonymous Wired reader. "Apparently the developers have taken '[Valve Time](http://developer.valvesoftware.com/wiki/Valve_Time)' to heart." says reader Phuzz. "Yes, we all know it's a labour of love by people who have other jobs," says a Wired reader named Erratum. "But jeez — it's been almost seven months since any media's been released. For all we know the team have all turned into headcrab zombies."
0964-bit-flash-player
3. 64-Bit Flash Player ---------------------- As desktop computing slouches toward a world of 64-bit applications, one of the most-anticipated 64-bit apps is [Adobe's Flash Player](http://www.adobe.com/products/flashplayer/). The beefier architecture would give the plug-in for web-based games and media content a much-needed boost in performance and stability. But Adobe's 64-bit Flash Player has been in the works for more than three years and the final code is still a moving target. As Wired reader trip@m00n points out, it was given to Linux users first, "then yanked back out from under us in 2008." The curious can currently grab a preview release of [Flash Player "Square"](http://labs.adobe.com/technologies/flashplayer10/square/) from Adobe Labs, which has support for 64-bit browsers — so far, only Safari and Internet Explorer, though official x64 support is coming in future versions of Firefox, Chrome and Opera. But Flash "Square" is still a pre-release experiment, not official, and not yet recommended for everyday use. It remains on a separate development track than the standard Flash Player.
10half-life-2-episode-3
2. *Half Life 2: Episode 3* --------------------------- The third and [final installment in the Half Life 2 story arc](http://www.halflife2.net/half-life-2-episode-3) could still be as far as two years out. Originally, [Valve](http://www.valvesoftware.com/index.html)'s plan was to release the various sequels to the enormously popular first-person shooter console game as individual episodes so there would be less downtime between installments. "That really worked out well," quips one Wired reader. The first episode was released in 2006, and Episode 2 came out in 2007. Now, three years later, Episode 3 still hasn't emerged. "Not only has the time between *Half Life* and *Half Life 2* been surpassed, the only information released on *Episode 3* is a years-old piece of art," an anonymous reader writes. In Valve's universe, things don't happen in normal human time, they happen in "[Valve time](http://developer.valvesoftware.com/wiki/Valve_Time)", where days and weeks are stretched to months and years. "Valve time be damned, enough already," says reader Kadayi.
11iphone-4-in-white
1. iPhone 4 in White -------------------- Apple gave us all a glimpse of the iPhone 4's snow-white skin — a luxurious alternative to the standard black shell — at the device's launch event in June. But instead of a white phone, all Apple has delivered is an elusive white whale. The white iPhone 4 was stuck in limbo without explanation for [a few weeks](http://stag-komodo.wired.com/gadgetlab/2010/06/apple-no-white-iphones-for-at-least-three-weeks/), then officially pushed to "[later this year](http://stag-komodo.wired.com/gadgetlab/2010/07/apple-white-iphone-delayed-until-later-this-year/)" before being delayed indefinitely. The iPhone 4 generally received glowing reviews, but the product's launch was pretty rocky. First came "[Antennagate](http://stag-komodo.wired.com/gadgetlab/2010/06/iphone-4-loses-reception-when-antenna-band-is-touched-firmware-issue/)" and the resulting free bumper-case giveaway to alleviate issues with flawed hardware. Then the white iPhone delay, which, from a company that typically meets its ship dates, was uncharacteristic. An Apple spokesperson [apologized for the delay](http://www.reuters.com/article/idUSTRE69P59W20101026) in a statement to Reuters in October, but the company hasn't ever explained the problem except to say it's been dealing with [manufacturing challenges](http://www.apple.com/pr/library/2010/07/23iphonestatement.html). Word on the street is the material used to fashion the white iPhone's Home button [didn't match the phone's faceplate](http://stag-komodo.wired.com/gadgetlab/2010/10/white-iphone-delay-explained-by-lucky-owner/), and therefore, didn't meet Steve Jobs' exacting standards. Still, Apple hasn't canceled the product. Instead, delivery has been pushed back to 2011 — at which point it will likely be canned altogether so as not to interfere with sales of the next generation iPhone.
