Gallery: 5 Unlikely Christmas Episodes We'd Love to See
01homeland-xmas
While an abundance of dark, frequently harrowing shows like *Homeland* and *The Walking Dead* isn't *necessarily* a bad thing for television, there's one thing missing from the majority of today's hard-hitting dramas: holiday episodes. Say what you want about shows on AMC and their breathless fidelity to telling difficult truths, but there's no denying\* that they'd be improved by an annual episode where the regular characters learn a little bit more about the true meaning of the holiday season -- and themselves as well. With that in mind, we suggest some potential storylines that would help make the season bright for the shows that tend to shy away from such festivity. Consider it our gift to you, dear overworked showrunners. *\* Note: This may not be true.* __Homeland__ ------------ With all the international and political intrigue available on every episode of the Showtime series -- not to mention the soap operatics and otherwise over-the-top drama that get squeezed in each week -- it's hardly surprising that *Homeland* has managed to successfully avoid the most wonderful time of the year in its three seasons to date. And yet, this year especially, there's even more reason for the holiday season to visit. *Okay, Hear Us Out:* As Brody struggles with his status as political pariah turned triple agent in Iran, his wife Jessica and children Chris and Dana try to enjoy the holidays as best as they can without him. What they don't know is that Saul and Carrie have taken it upon themselves to help the family, albeit without telling anyone other than Brody what they are doing. While Saul tries to discover what each of the Brody child wants for Christmas by going undercover as a Mall Santa, Carrie gets obsessed with the idea that NORAD's Santa Tracker is a smokescreen for a bigger international intrigue. As Brody almost causes at least three international incidents in an attempt to find a suitable Wi-Fi connection to Skype home on December 25, Saul has Quinn infiltrate the Brody home to secretly deliver the presents -- but no one is able to explain who ate the milk and cookies Jessica left by the fireplace on Christmas Eve. *The Christmas Song:* At one point, Brody flashes back to his heroin-crazed days in Caracas when he performed a tearful version of "I'll Be Home for Christmas," intercut with scenes of Carrie staring at a computer screen and Jessica staring out of a window.
02walkingdead-xmas
__The Walking Dead__ -------------------- Admittedly, the idea of a holiday-themed special episode of AMC's particularly relentless zombie drama seems a little unlikely. Even if the various survivors of the undead apocalypse could take the time from their busy schedules of alternating between (a) frowning and (b) fighting for their lives to realize what time of year it is, how would they be able to celebrate the holidays, knowing that death and/or un-death lurked at the bottom of every Christmas stocking? *Okay, Hear Us Out:* Rick and his people discover a young couple, Joe and Mary, trying to hide from the undead during a particularly harsh winter. Despite Rick's warnings that Mary's near full-term pregnancy might mean complications for the group, Carl allows the couple to shelter with them -- so long as they can help find sleeping accommodations. Thanks to a particularly clear night and a shining star in the sky, the group finds an abandoned hotel. Mary and Joe take up residence in the garage, where Mary gives birth with the help of Glenn and Michonne. Following a tense silence during which each member of the cast considers the true importance of family and loved ones, zombies attack the hotel, causing the group to flee. Unfortunately, Joe, Mary and their unborn child are captured by a zombie dressed as Santa Claus. As the rest of the group escapes, Carl tells his father that it was a miracle so many of them survived. *The Christmas Song:* An episode like this needs a holiday tune suitably dissonant to what's going on onscreen. Perhaps something like "Last Christmas" by Wham! could play while Joe, Mary and their unnamed child meet their ultimate fates.
APL03hannibal-xmas
__Hannibal__ ------------ There are doubtless those who would complain that inviting a cannibal to a holiday celebration is an attack on Christmas itself, if not on the concept of joy as a whole. Those people, however, are missing out on the essentially inclusive nature of this time of year. This is when everyone is part of our extended family, and all are welcome at our metaphorical table, even those whose offers to carve the meat should best be politely declined. *Okay, Hear Us Out:* As part of their male bonding experience, Hannibal invites Will over for dinner on Christmas Eve, promising him a meal unlike any other he has ever had. At first Will refuses the invitation, but after a minor personal epiphany at a grisly crime scene, he tells Hannibal that he will attend after all. Hannibal and Will work together on the murder, and after excusing himself to go prepare the meal, Hannibal tracks down the killer and in a particularly creepy scene, terrifies the culprit into confessing by describing his plans for the meal he's about to prepare -- in particular, what's going to happen to the "meat." The episode ends with Will sitting down to a sumptuous dinner with Hannibal that looks like something out of a 1950s magazine spread. Will takes a bite, and compliments Hannibal on the turkey. Hannibal smiles, and says that he has a special recipe that he can never share. *The Christmas Song:* During the final, festive scene, the audience can hear Nat King Cole's "The Christmas Song" in the background, forever ruining it by linking it to the idea that perhaps all turkey is perhaps rearranged murderer meat.
04got-xmas
__Game of Thrones__ ------------------- For a show that promises that "Winter is Coming," you'd think that a holiday-themed episode would be a natural progression. Sure, the fact that it takes place in a fantasy realm would tend to suggest that there's no such thing as "Thanksgiving," "Hanukkah" or "Christmas" in George R.R. Martin's fictional *Thrones*iverse, but that's easily fixed by simply inventing an obvious analog holiday to celebrate instead. Maybe something with roast dragon with stuffing on the table. *Okay, Hear Us Out:* On the eve of the annual celebration of some winter or solstice festival, Joffrey finds himself visited by seven ghosts in one night, each one representing one of the Kingdoms of Westeros. The ghosts, who want to make Joffrey change his ways and become a force for peace, take Joffrey on a tour through the history of the Iron Throne, each time revealing the tragic effects it has had for all who used it to sate their ambition and avarice. The final ghost reveals a future Joffrey on the Throne, and the Seven Kingdoms consumed by war. This vision has an unintended effect; Joffrey is instead inspired and pleased by this bloody vision, and sends assassins to kill major figures in each of the other kingdoms, believing his victory to be divinely assured. Stick in a subplot about Jon Snow somewhere to keep everyone else happy. *The Christmas Song:* The difficulty of sneaking a familiar holiday tune into something like *Game of Thrones* is far greater than it is on, say, any show that takes place in "our" world, so let's go for something far easier to accomplish: Add some sleigh bells to the regular theme song and call it a holiday remix.
05houseofcards-xmas
__House of Cards__ ------------------ There's a very obvious catch to the idea of a Netflix show having a Christmas special -- the "you can watch all of the episodes whenever you want" nature of Netflix programming means that the episodes don't have the seasonality or topicality of regular television programming. This is only truly a problem for those literal-minded fools who believe that the holidays are limited to a particular space on the calendar. As everyone else knows, the holidays live on all year in our hearts -- and everyone else can just skip the episode anyway. *Okay, Hear Us Out:* With the holidays looming large, Frank has been tasked with organizing the traditional White House party. Understandably, he sets out to make it the most successful holiday party in the tradition of American politics, with multiple politicians, journalists and power players to schmooze and manipulate. But during the planning process, his wife Claire meets an short, lame homeless orphan named Tim with whom she forms an unexpected emotional connection. Sensing that Tim threatens Claire's commitment to the party's success, Frank organizes a smear campaign against the homeless in Washington DC that involves blackmailing charity volunteers to ensure that all of the homeless are kept off the streets and out of his wife's view until the new year -- something that he publicly plays off as a major new initiative to help the capitol's underprivileged. Returning home the night before the party, he finds Claire sitting on the couch with Tim's cane in front of her. She reveals that she had only befriended the orphan so that he would gift his cane, an antique that was a gift from his dead grandfather, to her, and presents it to Frank as a token of their creepy affection to each other. Snow falls outside the Underwood residence. *The Christmas Song:* Kevin Spacey gets to show off his musical chops as Frank Underwood entertains an attractive new reporter with a rendition of "[Baby, It's Cold Outside](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FTNheCEUP_A)," punctuated with raised eyebrows and asides to the camera about how creepy that song actually is.
