Gallery: Gallery: Weather the Heat Wave With 16 Searing Cinematic Selections
01john-goodman-experiences-a-disturbing-vision-of-playing-the-lead-in-the-flintstones
When a heat wave like the one currently clobbering the East Coast hits, herds of pop culture fans naturally migrate to the cool depths of movie theaters or their own living room, where food is plentiful, the air is conditioned and they're largely safe from their greatest predator: other people. This is wise. [Violence and heat are linked](http://stag-komodo.wired.com/wiredscience/2011/07/hot-weather-violence/) according to researchers. While it may be annoying to listen to people predict plot points in a voice that only counts as a whisper in comparison to a bellowing bull moose, it's better than running into a sun-addled psychopath who's here to kill people and drink Gatorade -- and he's all out of Gatorade. Still, while violence in person is icky and often leads to unpleasantness, violence on the movie screen has long been considered primo entertainment, and much more wholesome for the young ones than a brief glimpse of a topless woman. So why not appreciate your chilly seat by watching one of these movies about how scorching heat turns people into vicious misanthropists? Above: ------ Perhaps the most Coenish of Coen Brothers movies, *__Barton Fink__* is about a writer who comes to Los Angeles -- in a heat wave, natch -- and is unable to write a movie script, which is a tragedy because clearly Los Angeles doesn't have enough screenplays floating around. Weird things involving John Goodman and John Goodman's sweaty jowls occur, and eventually it ends, like every Coen brothers movie, in an equal blend of catharsis and confusion.
02heatwave-is-australias-finest-contribution-to-noh-theater
The 1982 film __*Heatwave*__ is set in Edmonton, Alberta, during a blizzard. No, just kidding, it's set in Australia during a blazing summer in the early '80s, with all the accents and hairstyles that implies. There's something about architecture and murder, and that's all I got. There's almost no information about this movie on the web, and I sure as heck haven't watched it. It was nominated for an award from the Australian Film Institute, though, that's nice.
03the-jonas-brothers-reveal-their-hideous-true-forms-in-predator-2
__*Predator 2*__ has the courage to combine gang warfare, an alien stalker, Los Angeles weather and a lack of Arnold Schwarzenegger into a movie that broke records for being a sequel to __*Predator*__. It had to be re-edited many times to avoid getting an NC-17 rating, which means that by 2011 standards it's a soft PG-13. Danny Glover stars as someone who isn't Arnold Schwarzenegger.
04do-the-right-thing-is-mostly-about-hugs
__*Do the Right Thing*__ uses a heat wave as a metaphor for racial tension, or so my film studies professor told me. As a Brooklyn neighborhood gets steadily hotter, tempers fray and conflicts, many of them between the black and white members of the community, break out. In the end, though, the films message is a positive one, showing that people from all racial backgrounds can agree that rubbing ice on Rosie Perez is really sexy.
05kevin-costner-points-out-the-theater-exits-in-waterworld
__*Waterworld*__ is famous for going way over budget, for flopping at the American box office, and for being only the third movie to feature Kevin Costner drinking his own urine. The movie is set in a future Earth where global warming has melted the planet's icecaps and Republicans are feeling pretty sheepish. Costner is the only man who can save society by finding an island or something, and he is aided by his uncanny abilities to breathe underwater, swim quickly, and control sea life with his mind. Wait, no, that last one is Aquaman.
06william-hurt-negs-an-hb10-in-body-heat
If you think "hot movie" and "Kathleen Turner movie" are redundant, you'd be right, especially in the case of __*Body Heat*__, where Turner plays the dissatisfied wife of a rich man with an ironclad prenup. In the middle of a heat wave she starts an affair with a womanizing carpetbagger played by William Hurt, and in between sticky couplings they plan to murder her husband. Because if they planned to move to the coast of Mexico and get jobs as surfing instructors it wouldn't be much of a movie.
07you-are-not-as-attractive-as-either-of-the-stars-of-cat-on-a-hot-tin-roof
__*Cat on a Hot Tin Roof*__ was a disappointment to those expecting an animated feature about a dancing cat, but a big hit otherwise. On a steamy day in steamy Mississippi, steamy Elizabeth Taylor and equally-steamy Paul Newman visit a considerably less-steamy but still quite warm Burl Ives at his plantation to celebrate his birthday. Family tensions elevate, Taylor washes her arms, the requisite dark pasts and terrible secrets are revealed, and everyone drinks. A lot. Seriously, the drinking game for this movie is "Every time someone drinks, drink."
08before-dog-day-afternoon-al-pacino-starred-in-a-remake-of-singin-in-the-rain
In __*Dog Day Afternoon*__, a classic melange of heat, violence and poor organization, Al Pacino plays a would-be criminal who bungles a bank robbery. His performance has inspired generations who haven't even seen the movie to shout "Attica! Attica!" without even knowing why.
09no-seriously-dont-stand-so-goddamn-close-to-me
The science fiction epic __*Dune*__ is as loved by fans of Frank Herbert's 1965 novel of the same name as it is hated by fans of Frank Herbert's 1965 novel of the same name. Everyone else just thinks it's a big rip-off of __*Star Wars*__, with the desert planet and the magic powers and the Imperial whatevers. They even have "spice," that's what Han Solo smuggled, right?
10michael-douglas-plays-dilbert-in-dilbert-2-welcome-to-hellbert
You know those Family Circus cartoons where little Billy runs around the neighborhood and leaving a dotted line behind him? __*Falling Down*__ is like that if Billy picked up increasingly dangerous weapons on his cartoon trek, and instead of a dotted line there's a trail of the wounded and dead. Michael Douglas takes a stroll on a searing day and acts out everyone's traffic-jam fantasies, assuming everyone is a psychopath with a short trigger.
11during-the-rectification-of-the-vuldrini-the-traveler-came-as-a-large-and-moving-torg
In __*An Inconvenient Truth*__, the little-known prequel to __*Waterworld*__, former presidential candidate and mutated fish-man Al Gore attempts to warn Earth's inhabitants of the dangers of voting Republican. Combining gripping flow charts with edge-of-your-seat slideshows, Inconvenient Truth warns us that if we're not careful, we may end facing our deepest fear: having to drink Kevin Costner's urine.
12jimmy-stewart-does-this-hes-a-star-i-do-it-suddenly-im-on-the-sex-offender-registry
__*Rear Window*__ is such a classic of suspense and cinematography that it's been referenced like three dozen times on __*The Simpsons*__. Jimmy Stewart plays a man with a broken leg, a working camera and a callous disregard for his neighbors' privacy who witnesses what may or may not be a murder in the middle of what may or may not be a heat wave. I don't want to spoil the film, but come on, it's Hitchcock.
13this-is-why-you-dont-put-too-much-chlorine-in-the-swimming-pool
If you like chronicles, and you like Riddick, the __*The Chronicles of Riddick*__ is for you. Vin Diesel plays Vin Diesel in space, and he spends much of the movie on a planet called Crematoria. Is Crematoria hot? It's not called "Crematoria" because of the wide selection of dairy-based frozen treats, I will tell you that. The movie also stars Judi Dench as Judi Dench in space and Thandie Newton as Thandie Newton in a very tight dress.
14janice-and-beaker-star-in-a-muppet-summer-of-sam
Spike Lee returns to the themes of heat waves, neighborhood tensions and Italian food with __*Summer of Sam*__. Set in summer 1977, the movie concerns a series of real-life killings by a man known as "Son of Sam," who eluded the police for months largely because his father was really named "Joe." Critics have described it as a cross between __*Boogie Nights*__ and __*Se7en*__, but they weren't very good critics.
15wow-it-really-is-a-mass-of-incandescent-gas
__*Sunshine*__ features a team of astronauts on a mission to reignite the sun, sort of like __*Quest for Fire*__ with more English and less nudity. The movie is less about the actual sun and more about the tensions and rivalries between the crew members, which is good because, come on, reignite the sun?
16peter-otoole-fends-off-an-invasion-of-tusken-raiders-in-luke-of-tattooine
If your cinematic tastes run to sand, camels and sixties-era Hollywood hints about nontraditional sexuality, __*Lawrence of Arabia*__ is for you. Also, if you like good movies it's pretty awesome too. Peter O'Toole plays the Lawrence in question, a British soldier who is assigned to the area with the most sweeping vistas and widest aspect ratio available during World War I: Egypt. There, he starts hanging out with the locals and riding camels and nearly dying of thirst and performing brilliant military maneuvers and saving Coast City from a tidal wave. Wait, no, that last one is Aquaman.
