Thackeray Opines on Things Internet

While trying to research a half-remembered tale about an ancient general who ordered his troops to whip the ocean after it disobeyed his command, I came across the following stanzas in which 19th-century English novelist William Makepeace Thackeray describes King Canute's literal attempt to turn the tide.

Here, Thackeray exhibits an almost Nostradamus-like grasp on the ongoing battle between record industry and internet:

"Might I stay the sun above us, good sir Bishop?" Canute cried;
"Could I bid the silver moon to pause upon her heavenly ride?

If the moon obeys my orders, sure I can command the tide.

"Will the advancing waves obey me, Bishop, if I make the sign?"

Said the Bishop, bowing lowly, "Land and sea, my lord, are thine."

Canute turned towards the ocean–"Back!" he said, "thou foaming brine.

"From the sacred shore I stand on, I command thee to retreat;

Venture not, thou stormy rebel, to approach thy master's seat:

Ocean, be thou still! I bid thee come not nearer to my feet!"

But the sullen ocean answered with a louder, deeper roar,

And the rapid waves drew nearer, falling sounding on the shore;

Back the Keeper and the Bishop, back the king and courtiers bore.

And he sternly bade them never more to kneel to human clay,

But alone to praise and worship That which earth and seas obey:

And his golden crown of empire never wore he from that day.

King Canute is dead and gone: Parasites exist alway.

Update: The general I was trying to remember was Xerxes (thanks, fallnet). As it turns out, the historian Herodotus had a pretty good handle on the RIAA lawsuit situation himself. As he wrote in The Histories, Xerxes was trying to get his army across the Hellespont when

The men who had been given this assignment made bridgesstarting from Abydos across to that headland; the Phoenicians one offlaxen cables, and the Egyptians a papyrus one. From Abydos to theopposite shore it is a distance of seven stadia. But no sooner had thestrait been bridged than a great storm swept down, breaking andscattering everything.

When Xerxes heard of this, he was very angry and commanded that theHellespont be whipped with three hundred lashes, and a pair of fettersbe thrown into the sea. I have even heard that he sent branders withthem to brand the Hellespont. He commanded them while they whippedto utter words outlandish and presumptuous, "Bitter water, our masterthus punishes you, because you did him wrong though he had done younone. Xerxes the king will pass over you, whether you want it or not;
in accordance with justice no one offers you sacrifice, for you are aturbid and briny river." He commanded that the sea receive thesepunishments and that the overseers of the bridge over the Hellespont bebeheaded.

(image from american zombie)